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It's My Life!
Dear Diary...
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This is my diary. If you ever wanna know what goes on inside my crazy mind...just come here. But you still won't know everything.

January 4, 2004
HAHAHA! Every time I write in here I say I will write more often....I doubt that will ever happen. OMG so much has happened since I got out of school. Well I went to Maryland with my mom which was fun but by the end of the two weeks we just wanted to get away from eachother. Summer had some pretty weird stuff that I won't forget but it was pretty fun and I ended up getting in trouble alot which is okay too. In October I had the cops called on me because I stayed out all night with a few of my friends so my mom filed a missing child report and then I got grounded for a month. It really wasn't too bad and I learned alot and I am now closer to my mother which I am very happy about. I still go to my church but I am starting to go to my friend Holli's church which I like alot becuase it does alot of stuff for the youth. Like next Friday we are going on a ski trip and wont be back until 430am. I am so excited because I have never gone skiing before. But anyways...its getting late so if I ever do feel like writing more, then I will. But if not. Youre just stuck with this.

May 31, 2003

OMG I have not written for like two months. School just got out yesterday so thats like way exciting. Pouls graduation was last night and I was really happy for him cuz it has been hard for him. This summer will be so awesome. Im determined to get drunk and high this summer at least once. LOL. Everyone thinks im a goody-goody and I hate it. I get to go out to Maryland with my mom next week for two weeks. And her and Frank are prolly not together anymore. its a long story but I just wish theyd work it out. Its pissing me off seeing her so upset. And then I got a bf but Im gonna prolly dump him sometime really soon for a lot of reasons. His name is Adam. But Im gonna go now so I will try and write more often.

March 24, 2003
We are still at war but it seems like a lot of the Iraqis like us which is good. This week is spring break. Thursday-Sat morn I went out to Lee's Summit with my mom and Monica. It was fun. The pool sucked but other than going shopping it was the only fun thing to do there. Then she slept over again Sat. night and went home Sunday morning. Then that evening I had friends over and Holli spent the night. Since Wed. night, this will be the first night of me not having anybody sleeping over which is kinda nice cuz after awhile I just get sick of it. My mom is making me so mad. She always thinks I'm questioning her which is really starting to make me mad. She gets mad at me now for every little thing I do. Sometimes that just makes me want to go against her even more. It's like she told me to clean the kitchen and I was like well I thought we were leaving. Then she starts throwing a fit that I am always questioning her and all this other crap. But oh well... What she use to be fine with about a month ago she now gets mad about. Like she was getting mad at me and Monica Thursday night cuz we kept talking about this majorly hot guy sitting some tables down from us at dinner. It's weird. I am so tired though. I was gonna go to the movies with some ppl but then decided not too. Later.

March 19, 2003
War has begun. It is 9:23 right not and about not even an hour ago at 8:30CMT we attacked Baghdad. Its shocking but I guess its what had to be done. I heard Bush's speech and I know we will make it through this war. About 10 seconds after he was done the rain started pouring down profusley. It was as if God is crying with our whole county and letting us know he is on our side. I am scared but I know through faith in God, this country will be led the right way. What an emotional day for America as a whole. May God bless America.

March 15, 2003
This weekend wasnt as much fun as I had planned. I was going to go skating with a few of my friends today but that didn't work out. Last night was fun though. Sara, Holli, and I went and saw How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days. Holli is totally like the girl in their and we figured out that this one dude Holli's into is like the guy on there. So it was kinda like watching them if they ever had a relationship. Which hopefully they will. Cuz theyd both look cute together and theyre both really good looking. (If he's reading this then he knows I'm talking about him. Ask her out.You and her are meant for eachother totally.) I ordered a huge thing of popcorn but didnt eat too much of it. On Thursday Im going with my mom out to Kansas City to look at this one school and I'll prolly have my own hotel room with my moms room connected by a door so Im way excited. It's kinda scary though too. Im just happy that she actually trusts me, a 16 yr old wild girl in her own hotel room for at least 3 nights if not more. Until then this week will be way stressful cuz I have 2 big projects due in Journalism and 1 big essay due in English. Kinda sucks, but oh well. Gots to be going. Laterz.

March 12, 2003
Oh my gosh! I have not written forever. Well I dont have my license yet cuz the momma says Im not ready yet (even though I am). 3rd qrtr cutoff is tommorow so I'm working hard to get it all done.  Holli cut her hair today in layers BY HERSELF! Im like way scared. Mom went out to KC last weekend so that was good to get a break from her.  I love her to death but shes too over-protective of me. Lately it seems like she wants an explanation for everything I do which is really starting to piss me off. She should trust me ya know. Im 16 years old and she freaks out it seems like when I talk to a guy now. I got this one letter from National Honor Roll saying Im a nomminee to get in I guess. I prolly wont get in but Ill of course send in my profile just in case I do. I didnt even think I did that well in school. It seems like most people are changing for the worse (besides Sara and Jenny). Holli is turning into a snobby bitch (not to me but she cussed out this one adult) Monica is just wild and lies to her mom 24-7 and Charlene wanted me to go on a road-trip this summer with her,her bf, and....DAVE. Yes! Dave my kinda sorta xbf from last summer.As bad as this sounds I dont even think I'd want to go cuz Im pretty sure me and him would end up doing some pretty bad stuff together. And I would not want that to happen even though that he is darn hot. And she told me to just not tell my mom. It seems like me, Jenny, and Sara are the only ones who aren't being so bad.And I have to admit...even Im getting a bad side on me again but I'm still with the good side too. It is so weird. It just that everyone is changing all of a sudden. I still cant believe that in less than 2 yrs I'll be an adult. Im not even done with being a kid yet and Im already missing my childhood and Im still in it. It's just it seems I've grown up so fast. Ive decided that the two songs that best describe me are both from Britney Spears. There "Not a Girl, Not Yet a Woman" and "Overprotected" They are like totally me. I was thinking a few nights ago about my dreams and hopes for the future and I decided that I was going to do whatever I could to achieve those dreams. I want to grad from college and hopefully go back for a masters, be an elem teacher, get married, have children, be successful in work and in the family. I just want to be an inspiration to people and to help people out. Well I need to go to bed so I will try writing more often.

February 26, 2003
Im sitting here with the worst stomach ache feeling like I am about to explode. I think my grade is now a C in Chemistry. Poul is going to a neurosergeon tommorow to see when his surgery to fuse the bones in his neck is.  Its really bad so even though we dont get along, i hope it will help him. Keyboarding was boring cuz Billy left early. Like always...American Govt. was boring too. I was supposed to get my license tommorow except my mom is like no which really pisses me off. I also spoke to John today. Hes a sweetie and hes got a gf now so Im happy for him. I g2g.

February 25, 2003
I started my new updated website. Steven was a total asshole today but hey...whats new about that. He thinks he has gone through more stuff than i have. I think not. He just wants me to feel guilty for dumping him ten days before Winter Sports. Today in seminar we had most of our time taken away for this one assembly. But Im so happy we are finally done with Julius Ceaser. I have an Advanced Geometrey test tommorow. I think I'll do really bad. We are finnally getting a new dishwasher so now I dont have to wash dishes by hand. Thank god. I was supposed to go to FCA tonite but Holli's dad has a new Basset Furniture Direct store opening up so she couldnt go so I didnt go. Laterz.